When I volunteered
to do this I didn’t realize how much I hated not being in the playoffs. Man, was that an oversite. There are 4 teams that scored over 13,000
points this year, and three are in the playoffs. The fifth highest team didn’t reach
12,500. Due to my constant groaning, you
know I am the one left out. Thus, this
PR is late, rushed, and has very few jokes.
There are most likely a comedy of errors, and it’s possible I’ll just
give up before it’s over. This week’s PR
is Mitch golfing.
After taking a look
at how each team built their roster, we’ll preview each of this week’s match
ups. I was going to highlight each teams
expected record, all play record and points %, but Mitch stopped updating those
when he lost 4 in a row to fall out of the playoffs.
I currently have two
players outside the top 10 at their position in my line-up.
Tim
Getting Tom Brady in
the 2nd round really set Tim’s team off right. However, it isn’t a one man team. Lamar Miller started poorly but ended as the
6th best running back. Brandon Marshall was solid all year and
finished 5th…drafting both Cutler and Fitzpatrick gave him good depth
at QB, the league’s most scarce position.
I shouldn’t have to remind anyone what a shitty qb can be traded for in
this league, but it kind of went under the radar that Tim traded Ryan
Fitzpatrick for the best WR in football, Julio Jones. He also made some solid waiver pick-ups in
Allen Hurns, who scored in like 7 straight weeks, Darren McFadden, and most
recently Spencer Ware who adds some depth going into the playoffs.
Elkins
We all know the 2015
Gronky Tonk’s road to success. Draft the
eponymous Gronk, stockpile RBs and WRs, grab some late round QB fliers and
spend too much money buying jersey’s for his victims (still waiting,
Ryan!). Not only did he draft some great
players, that depth he built was huge as he lost a lot of players to
injury. Dez was hurt most of the season,
Keenan Allen is done along with Justin Forsett.
What separates Tim and Elkins is their post draft moves…Elkins added
nobody of any note, and had to have the @Commish veto his only trade bc he
forgot he offered the deal.
Drew
Oh, man. Drew’s best draft pick, LeVeon Bell, and his
best waiver add, Dion Lewis, both went down to injury. His
team got in the playoffs because Andy Daulton played out of his mind, and Drew
did a decent job playing the right guy between Stafford and McCown. Speaking of McCown…Drew picked him up when he
released Joke Bell. Here are some
players drafted soon after Bell; LeSean McCoy, Calvin, AJ Green, Lamar Miller,
Randall Cobb… They, along with almost every other single player in the league,
would have been a better pick.
Cha
Cha drafted a good team and then traded it for
a different good team. The league’s top
point scorer, Cha relied on great starts from Palmer and Rodgers, before
trading Rodgers for Chris Johnson and Russell Wilson. Wilson has been solid, and Johnson was
mediocre before being injured last game.
Thankful for Cha, he picked up David Johnson, who should see a lot of
carries this week…unless Andre Ellington does.
He also traded Jason some scrubs for LeSean McCoy and Marcus Mariota,
who he then traded to me for Mike Evans.
I’m lost. Nonetheless, Cha has a
solid team that no one wants to play in the playoffs. One last thing, Chris Ivory may have helped
Cha to an undefeated record.
Taylor
Any Place But Last
is in the playoffs, despite scoring the third fewest points. Here are the player ranks of his current
starting lineup. 12, 21, 55, 42, 49, 11,
40, 14, 7, and 2. I’m not sure why or
how, but he has two spots on his bench unoccupied. Still, he has some hope of making noise in
the playoffs. Thomas Rawls has been a
great replacement for 1st pick, Marshawn Lynch. Javorius Allen has gone for 115 and 144 since
taking over for Justin Forsett. ( Solid pick-ups, Taylor!) When healthy, Alshon has been good and he is
playing the shitty 49ers this weekend.
Jameis has gotten better as the season has gone on, just raping
opponents, and the Bengals d should crush the Browns this weekend. The one worrying match up this weekend is
Drew Brees going against the Panthers.
Holy MOLEY is that a bad match up.
Ridder
Ridder drafted well,
and for the first time did the bare minimum to keep his team together during
the season. Cam Newton has been great,
Nuke Hopkins catches everything, and when Jamal Charles went down, Charc West
stepped up. Fleecing his big bro in the
Calvin Johnson trade must feel nice.
Despite not having a good week since week 6, Marvin Jones remains in the
flex position, although Tom Brady’s new top WR is on the bench.
Match-Ups
Garvin vs Garvin III
Taylor has his face
on a sheep for his team avatar and a picture of his dog as his personal
avatar. I just noticed that. Anyways, these two should be happy to face
each other, as they both would probably get beaten by Cha or Ridder. Both are a bit banged up and neither has set
the world on fire in the weeks leading up to the playoffs.
Drew will need Andy
Dalton to match or better the 218 points he put up against the Browns earlier
in the year. CJ Anderson will need to
continue to be a real player, and he has to hope that…that…Idk, that Shaun
Draughn is an actual NFL player? Drew
should go to the Chargers game this week, as it may decide his fantasy
fate. Emmanuel Sanders should continue
to benefit from having a living person at QB, and Anderson gets to face to 32nd
ranked run defense to keep his comeback train rolling. Meanwhile, if the Broncos get up, Danny
Woodhead could get a lot of work…
Brees vs the Panthers
isn’t the only tough match up for Taylor this week. Rawls goes against the 5th ranked
run d, Vincent Jackson and Winston face a top d in Atlanta, and if for some
reason Shane Vereen gets the start this week, he plays the 3rd
ranked Jets.
ESPN projects a narrow Taylor win, and less than 3 minutes
ago I agreed, but for no real reason I have decided to join Team Drew. He’s so dreamy.
Cha vs Ridder
Eric put up 1,582
points in a week 6 victory in their only meeting. That score, along with some others put up by
both teams, highlights the fact they have some real studs on their roster that
are capable of putting up monster weeks.
Damn near every core player has put up a 250+ week.
Eric has some great
match ups this weekend. His running
backs get the Browns and the Raiders, and Cam Newton is going to murder the New
Orleans D. He has to worry about a
banged up Calvin not getting a lot of looks tonight against the Packers, and
Kirk Cousins not playing a terrible team and being Kirk Cousins again. Then again, Cousins goes on Monday Night and
putting up big points in a comeback victory seems like something that would
happen.
Cha Cha has some
tough QB match-ups with Palmer going against the Rams and Wilson against the
Vikings. However, those guys are
actually really good and are pretty dominant against whoever. Unlike the other 3 playoff teams going this
week, Cha has some actual line up decisions to make. New starter David Johnson, or old stand by
Frank Gore? Permanently injured Danny
Amendola or Donte Moncrief coming off of a 100+ week. He even has the 6th and 7th
ranked TE’s to decide between. If Cha
doesn’t win, he’s sure to have someone on his bench that would have made the
difference.
ESPN projects a
1218-1127 win for Cha and I lean that way too.
However, I should mention for the 100th time that Cam gets to
play the Saints; he could be the difference in a close week. Okay, I now think Eric will win. Except, I’m not sure that Charc West will get
a full workload with Spencer Ware’s great game last week. So I’ll go with Cha.
My team will put up
the most points this week.