The king is dead.1. Tim We have a new PR King! Tim takes over the top spot after knocking off Ryan's previous undefeated collection of NFL players. Matt Forte's health is the BIG question mark for this team going forward. If Forte's absence lingers Tim will have a hard time finding points to fill his FLEX spot. Guys like Ronnie Hillman and Alfred Blue aren't getting it done in the playoffs. Also I just looked at Jason Witten's stats, dude sucks.
2. Mitch I'm back! Just like last season I'll be heading into the playoffs (Oh you heard right, I'M MAKING THE PLAYOFFS! Fuck you if you think any different, you are stupid.) with the best QB combo in the league, plus this year I also have the #1 RB. Oh AJ Green is also awesome and I'm pretty sure THIS is the week Jeremy Hill gets back on track. I'm winning the championship.
3. Elkins Dropping Elkins a few spots after his first loss of the season is probably a little harsh but in my defense, I REALLY like my team. DKY Mark Ingram is the #2 RB?! Devonta Freeman and Mark Ingram are the top two fantasy running backs. Is this really the world we want to live in? Oh ya, Dez Bryant is back and that's really cool for Elkins. Tyrod Taylor is also back and Derek Carr looks like the real deal. For real, go to the bar this Sunday and watch the Raiders / Vikings game.
4. Drew I have no idea how Drew is any good. Looking at his roster right now and he doesn't have a single guy that is any good. And yet, Drew has the 3rd highest All Play Win% and a 7-2 record. Teams will be tanking games at the end of the season trying to get Drew in the first round of the playoffs.
5. Taylor I'm all in on the Taylor Playoff Bandwagon! Drew is dead in the water after injuries to Bell and Lewis, while Taylor is finally playing at full strength. The last two weeks Taylor has a 19-3 All Play Record. I'm pretty sure that's the best in the league. A big part of that is Drew Brees having a Voodoo cruse lifted from his arm and a great Jeremy Langford claim. GO TAY!
6. Cha In what might have been a "loser goes home" match last week, Cha and Justin threw fire all day but in the end it was Cha who squeaked by to keep his playoff hopes alive. BTW has anyone who lost a "loser goes home" match actually gone home?! I for real probably watched 10 or so of these matches in my youth and dammit, the loser always found a way back into the ring. Also I'm pretty pumped to play Cha when Plamer/CJ/Wilson are matched up against each other's elite defenses, while a pissed off Rodgers gets the Lions. I'm gunna steam roll Cha by 500.
7. Mike/Andrew Remember how Drew lost Bell and Lewis to injury the last couple weeks? Well, no one is happier about that than these guys. Blount and Willimas looks like the real deal and Antonio Andrews might be a solid FLEX option. Plus Cooks is looking better with the resurgence of Brees and HOLY SHIT I just took a look at Crabtree's last three weeks, better than could ever be expected! These guys are still hanging around.
8. Justin I'm calling it, Justin's season is OVER. You can see the hope fading with each desperate trade offer he sends. He's pulled off some great trades but last week's loss to Cha put the fork in this squad.
9. Dave Andrew Luck is dead and Dave may as well be too. Charles Sims is starting at RB, Nate Washington is starting at OP and his bench is more red than the Findlay Market Parade. Good joke Mitch, good joke. Enjoy your last few moments with The Belt Dave, I'm coming for it.
10. Eric You know what happens when you wait until Sunday to fill out your roster? You wind up with a total of 10 points from your starting TE and RB. Eric missed out on two starting RBs - and Kaps replacement - on Wednesday so on Sunday he got his ass handed to him. I've had enough with this team and he's not reading this anyway, NEXT!
11. Jesse Moving Jesse up a spot in hopes of improving his moral from a "Last Days Robin Williams" level to a "Kurt Cobain Unplugged Album" level. Here's a few things you can hang your hat on this year: - Latavius Murray was a good 5th round selection! - Karlos Willimas has been pretty good. - Michael Floyd is coming on strong! Actually none of those things were all that good. Sorry buddy.
12. Jason Just a couple weeks ago a 2 and a half beer deep Jason was so sure he was making the playoffs he bet me $20 that his suck squad would find its way into the post season. Hey Jason:
PS I am the ROFLCOPTER and you are the little guys being hit by the laser. Fuck you dummy.